Still banned

Many of you are aware of the fact that I have been banned from joining Match.com ever again. Apparently I didn't take their service seriously enough. Despite repeated attempts using different usernames and email addresses, they somehow figure out it's me. By popular demand - here's the profile I submitted that lead to me being blacklisted........

3/15/2002

I've had my profile on Match for over 6 months now and none of you chicks has contacted me. What's wrong with you? Did you not see my picture? You're not going to get anyone better looking than me. While we're on the topic, what tragic event happened in your life that made you decide you aren’t going to be able to find a guy unless you go online? You decide not to leave the house anymore? Someone pour battery acid on your face? Listen, if I was a chick, I’d be able to find a guy without having to shop online for him. Enough of that, I don’t mean to put you down. All I’m saying is I’m probably the best guy you’re ever going to get to go out with you. And I don’t mean that in a good way. Your options are drying up, sister.

What I’m looking for in a woman?… well that’s a tough one. How about- exactly the opposite of every other girl I have every met. The last 25 girls I’ve gone out with have had the mental acuteness of my Alzheimer afflicted grandmother. At least my grandmother knew when to shut her mouth. I’m looking for a girl who doesn’t talk much. My perfect match would have very low self-esteem. I think a lot of women don’t understand their subordinate role in the world and that causes conflict in relationships. Most of the women I have gone out with have not had serious relationships. I’ve had over 40 serious relationships, so I know what I’m talking about. If you know how to take orders and cook eggs, we’ll probably get along. So email me. Let’s go out.